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It’s Not What You Wanted, But Is it Worth Having?

Things don’t always turn out how you want them to. That doesn’t mean they didn’t turn out well. Don’t miss out on something great just because it’s not great in the way you wanted it to be.

Mailbag: Pursuing Ideas and Destructive Habits

A reader asks when you should chase/abandon dreams, and whether it’s better to quit indulging in habits entirely or try to enjoy them in moderation.

Life Has No Strategy Guide: There’s No Right Way

Taking things personally, feeling like a victim, fear of uncertainty, “Nice Guy” syndrome – these are the sort of things you end up with when you believe that there’s a “right” way to get what you want in life.

Love The Process, Not Just The Outcome

In our rush to get the outcomes we want, we sometimes forget that the process is what we’re actually going to be living.

It’s Never Going To Get Easier – Do It Anyway

It’s never getting easier. You’ll never have more time than you do right now. What are you waiting for?

No One Wants To Be Your Reason For Living

There’s a particularly toxic idea spread by love songs and romcoms. It’s repeated ad nauseam by “Nice Guys” and drunk exes who’ve lost all semblance of self-respect.

The Root of Clinginess and Neediness

There are certain things every person needs to be able to do for themselves. If you don’t provide any of those things for yourself, even a tiny bit from others will seem like a lot.

Needy, Clingy Behavior Makes Everything A Transaction

Someone always feels like they’re not getting enough. Either not enough time or not enough independence. Not enough affection or not enough space. Not enough trust or not enough respect for boundaries.

Blame Is An Anchor: Fault Doesn’t Matter

The question isn’t whether or not you’re to blame for the state you’re in. The question is: Do you want to stay this way?

Responsibility Is Like A Giant Spiked Club

It looks scary as hell, but you get to pick that fucker up and beat the crap out of your problems with it.

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